In the spirit of bitterness and malcontent, I would like to introduce my new jaded blog entitled Why _______ Sucks. As a man who knows everything, I welcome controversy and arguments of all kinds. It merely provides me with opportunities to showcase my superior wit and demean those who dare cross me. Blogs are all about posting crap that pisses people off. At least that's my motivation. So in the spirit of this narrow-minded notion I introduce a blog that is sure to draw scathing responses, ridicule and misguided criticism. I challenge any RHT members or fans to dispute my righteous claims in any way shape or form. Here goes . . . .
Karaoke sucks. It sucks to listen to, it sucks to participate in - it even sucks to spell. I know, I know after a few beers who cares, belt it out, sing louder! I'll tell you who cares - me. When I go to a bar/club I don't want to here a 10 minute rendition of "The Ballad of Curtis Lowe" by a chain-smoking grandma. Nor do I want to hear 7 women (who are all too scared to sing by themselves) chime in on "It's My Party and I'll Cry if I Want To." Any activity that requires drunkeness to be enjoyed must not be worthwhile. (wait, i take that last statement back). At any rate, Karaoke is killing the live band scene (real motive for blog) and a cheap Karaoke machine is a much more economical choice for bar owners than paying people who actualy practice a song a couple of times before the performance.
When by chance you do hear a good Karaoke singer, it only makes you wonder how good they could really be if they sang in a real band. I know what you are thinking, "Supervesey hates Karaoke cause he can't sing." Partially true, I'll admit. But neither can 75% of all Karaoke singers. I even have to listen to Karaoke singing at my family dinners. "Please sing that Merle Travis song again, Jim" I don't know about you but I can't take this anymore. If we have to have Karaoke, can we at least do away with a few tunes we have to hear sung every freakin' time?? Free Bird, Secret Agent Man, Sweet Home Alabama, arargaggh!!!
But I digress . . . . are you with me? Or agin' me? Hit me with your best shot. (another Karaoke gem!) Oh yeah - and if you were at Senoir Frog's and heard your's truly doing Love Shack - don't hold that against me. It was Jose Cuervo singing.
PS Before Wills posts it, I've already thought of the Why "Supervesey's Blog" Sucks as a future topic.
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LOL! You know, I don't mind guys who are drunk and having a good time, but it's the guys who really think they can sing that kill me. They travel around hitting the karaoke bars just waiting to show off when in reality they're making absolute fools of themselves. Plus, there's always an Elvis imitator in the bunch.
ReplyDeleteBastards.
Karaoke means "tone deaf" in japanese so that explains it right there.... it's not meant to be done professionally so you need to take it with a grain of salt..
ReplyDeletei agree with shoe on this.. a lot of the time (and in the right setting) karaoke is cool as hell.. if you've got a good group of people partaking, it'll be a blast.. i think it's best in an actual "Karaoke Bar", but what can you do right? there's on in c-bus off of 161 that's tight i know..
but when you've got some slapstick on the mic singing "Careless Whisper" ala Wham, someone needs to pull a kimbo slice and fuck a brotha up..
i also agree that it does suck when you just want to go out and have a couple beers and watch the game and you have all that bullshit to put up with.. i must say that after i was on the road for a few years playing bars and talking to the people that run them, it's easier on them to just have boring karoake and dj's and shit like that because that's what people want.. i'm a live music fan no matter what, but all in all, most of the time it just doens't bring bodies thru the door on a night after night basis... that's why people who are seeing a band for the first time are always yelling out requests.. "play some skynyrd", shit like that.. they're idiots when it comes to the scene..
i'm going to go work on my rendition of "Motown Philly" now..
ez
I understand the sentiments but help is on the way. Two words: Rock Band. All of those assholes will invest in this game and then they won't have to leave the confines of their own home (hopefully anyway). They can download their own list, invite like minded idiots to their houses and have a good time. Furthermore, they can be joined on the drums and bass guitar by people who have no desire to learn how to play an instrument. I've never sung karoke at a bar and never will, with the exception of if a hot chick is goading me on (priorities are a must). But I will say, let people get loaded and sing in their own basements. Amen.
ReplyDeleteThere are only two places I will sing unless completely shit-faced: my car & in the shower. Although, since I've aged a bit the shower singing has been replaced by yelling at the AM talk radio host, weatherman, and sports jockey. Maybe just some quiet time would be good - just me & my loofa...
ReplyDeleteGo kimbo slice on a brotha - I'm rollin' over here!
ReplyDeleteHey Vesey, you know you can use paragraphs, right? Who the hell taught you to write?
ReplyDeleteSorry Shoe, - I didn't know this was for a grade. Now that I know this site is policed by "the man," I'll be more careful. Grammar wasn't exactly my teacher's top priority in jr. high.
ReplyDelete. . . but burning Christmas trees and raising rodents was.
ReplyDeleteHey I've been one of those drunk guys that sing "Sweet home Alabama"!!!
ReplyDeleteBut I have to be waist deep in the Guiness to do it.
Karaoke does have its proper place.....
ReplyDeletelike next to my nuts.
KARAOKE SUCKS